When there is fear, there will be faith.

I already know what’s wrong with me. It was the fear I have within me. The fear that is always stocked up and always hindered every possible thing that I can do. The only reason why I ended up miserable and disappointed with myself. The reason I always care for everyone’s opinion, conscious on my every move and being dependent in any way. I let myself be driven by that fear all along never knowing that I feel as if it’s the natural feeling that I can have. I never let my surroundings, thoughts, movements widened in any possible ways. When every opportunity pass and I stand like a statue not doing anything at all, I regretted not doing the things that I wanted to do telling myself that “I don’t really want it” when the fact is I always wanted it. This fear that is drowning beneath me so deep and like a natural thing flowing in my veins from my mentality makes me selfish in some situation and hurt other people that I love. I let myself being flown by others and failed to stand in my own feet because I don’t have the guts. I let myself behind the shadow of everyone telling myself that it’s okay to be just like that. I cannot set my foot to the light and let myself lie inside the box. I’m like the lice of a rabbit in the magician’s hat, letting it see what’s reality is and let myself be drowned in his head full of fur and hair. I cannot let myself be like this. Being driven by this stupid fear. My friends always thought that I’m really okay, a practical and simple me when the fact is, I am always scared, afraid, a coward with the world. Now I know what’s the only thing that can defeat not only my fear but everyone’s fear and it’s FAITH. Little by little, the fear is fading leaving a scar. All it takes is time to learn and to strengthen that faith.